The Teapot's Cabin

i just can't understand why people would not want to speak up. what are they fearing exactly? fear of being projected otherwise? fear of being rejected? fear of losing a friendship or a job? the fear of not being listened to? the fear of others' perception against you? well, needless to say, i have been in that position before. although being loud, some would not believe that i would be afraid to speak up in public. in actual fact, i am loud when i am comfortable with my surrounding and the people i am with. if not, i would just be the quiet and shy person whom everyone would not think of me as..haha.....weird but true huh? pelik tapi benar only after i am comfortable with myself in my surrounding, will then i start to show my true colors..the prettiest colors la of course..hehe......which is the current state i am in... Often enough, people may think why i am being "noisy" all of a sudden, but i guess that i have came to the realization that being silent would not ge...

Life in turmoil..thats how exactly life is for me now... when you thought you did the right thing, think again, have second thoughts..maybe it is not what it seems to be.. well, i did make a vey big decision lately, a risk which I myself did not dare to take but took it anyway and now i am having second thoughts... so much has been talked, so much has been discussed, so much i have heard...all having their own points and views..but at the end of the day, it all comes down to me... i do not want to dissapoint anyone, especially my loved ones..but most importantly, i should not disapoint myself too.... i did not realise the effect of my decision till i really talked about it the other day..my reaction showed that i did make a drastic decision without thinking it thoroughly..but i did what i had to.. well, everything around us would not satisfy us all the time, there is always a loop hole somewhere which may be bothering us so much as compared to the whole picture... and now i am being pl...