The Teapot's Cabin

It is so disturbing that I can't even lay down on the bed to just sleep and put the mind to rest for the night... the mind is so full of stuff that happened throughout the day that it wishes to keep me awake, put my thinking cap on and decipher the entire situation I am in or will be heading in... Arrrggghhh... I hate it when such situation arises...when things are mention to me, giving me hope that things will work out for the better, motivating me to plan ahead for it, but in the end, crumbles when what you hoped for turns out to be something else.... and that's when the mind decides by itself without bothering about the body which is weaken by the minute, considering this late hour.....the mind just refuses to let go, refuses to leave it till tomorrow, refuses to settle and rest.....why la? maybe it is trying to tell me something subconsciously (i hope...knowing that i will end up as a zombie tomorrow with this wide awake, midnight post)..... Oh thou mind of mine, what ...

i always like to look at things around me and reflect....it may be a good trait or it may be otherwise. good because i tend to see things beyond of what they meant to be...but bad because i tend to overthink...and the latter has always gotten me into trouble.... it is the time of the year again...the year is ending soon....and time to reflect on the year again...and plan for the year ahead......sigh....... so much so that i like to look forward, at times the past and the reality seem to pull you back in....to realize that life is so shitty at so many areas, with its many nooks and crannies.... all lump into one.... it takes time to enlighten all these shit in life...but do we have the time to do that? life is indeed short. have seen both extremes lately and it is scaring the hell out of me (yes, i admit that).... guess, i just have to live in the moment and leave God to do the rest. Come what may. God bless us all. Amen.

It is very interesting to see how two person react to the same situation. I'm speaking from my own experiences and looking it on my colleague's experiences. Well, keeping the details and names off, let me give you a few examples....  a) the boyfriend does not text the girlfriend for a few days. Girlfriend A takes it hard and got mad at the boyfriend because knowing that he has his phone with him all the time, yet does not reply to her texts. Girlfriend B on the other hand, just play it cool, knowing that the boyfriend is busy and will need his own space. b) the couple decides to go on a date, to hang out and spend time with each other. Boyfriend A ask girlfriend A to decide, saying that girlfriend  A is more familiar with places around the city. Girlfriend A got mad and insulted by such thoughts. Boyfriend B ask girlfriend B to decide. Girlfriend B have no clue. In the end both laugh it off and randomly headed to somewhere. no need to ask the details, i certainly wo...

is it really so hard to have expectations? Why can't we all have expectations? Life without expectations are just plain boring because we have no purpose in life, we have nothing to look forward to.... well, expectations have good and bad elements. Good being that it can be the source of motivation to look out for something better in the near future. Bad being that we will be hurt if our expectations are not met....hurts...disappointments..... oh God....help me to move on....it is depressing :(

I was just looking at my blind dog yesterday,...yes, you read it correct, my blind dog. My dog is blind, just a few weeks ago. it is a sad finding but it has been expected long due to his breed, which is very prone to such blindness at his current age now...nonetheless, as hard as it is for him, it is also equally hard for us to adapt to his condition... yeah, as I was saying, i was watching and observing how he has been reacting to sounds, since he can no longer react to his sight. his other senses are now heighten and being used more frequent, and mostly. his hearing. He would just bark at anything that irritates him, without knowing the source of the sound. Whatever that bothers him, he would just bark, and would not stop till the sound stops. Imagine if a neighbor was renovating his house, he would just bark at whatever sound the equipment make. And that was what happened yesterday. imagine the irritation! although i might be irritated for a moment, but that got me thinking and...

I am blessed. For the wonderful 29 years of life. For all the ups and downs, the dos and donts, the bad and the good, the pretty and the ugly, I am truly thankful. For these past recent years, that I started to count for on my blessings than my shortfalls. I used to compare and feel disappointed with myself when looking at others' achievements and where they have been or what they have done...yet, who knows how are their real "life"? who knows whether are they really enjoying it or was it all just a gimmick? And with that realization, I started to cut loose on myself more...started to think less, to worry less, to take things as they come and knowing that there is always a higher power at play in my life. Then, things started to look differently. I started to pay more attention to the people around me, to start looking at all the opportunities around me, start to take things one step at a time....and pay more attention to my loved ones... To choose kindness, to choo...

I have always been very cautious about what people think about me...i always care a lot more of what others think rather than what I think....which i know, is not a very good trait of mine.....although it is very difficult, yet, that is what i have been willing to put up with for so many years..... till i recently discovered how this whole thing "showed results"a few days ago......I'm still figuring out whether it was a good result or a bad one.... Allow me to discuss further......just a line of status (on facebook) showed me how people view me... i am often viewed as the fierce one, the nonsense one (when it comes to work related), the know-what-she-wants one...in short, the strong independent one. not bragging, but that was how people view me...and indeed that has showed me a lot more than i notice about myself.... that was how people know me, and yet, i did not know that all these while, i portrayed myself as that individual... only a few people who knew who i r...