Opening up

i've learnt in one of my classes that it is not encouraging and even not healthy to keep our feelings and problem to ourself..because in long term, it may have an effect on our health and our mind too...which at first i regard it as a 'myth' or just something which i would discard and disagree

why so?? because that's how i've been living my life...keeping everything to myself'; my anger, my dissapointments, my frustrations, my irritations,etc....just about everything..except for the positive ones which i would be happy to share with others....but that's just me...and certainly, it doesn't really bother me that much, although at some point, it does is a painful pill to swallow..

however, lately, i would want to agree with what i learnt earlier. the pressure and stress that i have been through lately is seriously something that i could not handle anymore. too much anxiety and lack of understanding is seriously eating me inside out and it was really costing me alot...because i have been having headaches a few nights in a row. and it is not just a simple headache, cured with Panadol..but the feeling is just so bad...it feels like as though my brain is gonna explode from my skull at any moment in time, and i became "mood-less"(is there such a word?? haha....), didn't have the drive to do anything at all...just a very bad headache and an empty soul....thats just how i felt and was going through....it was a tough time indeed.....

then i slowly try to open up to my friends on my problems and the things that i have been going through...and seriously, though after much coaxing, i still couldnt find the strength to just open up to people and share with them my problems...what to do? that's just a bad nature of mine...but thanks to my friend also for being patient and understanding of my situation. appreciate it :)....eventualy, after an overnight thought and a visit to church eventualy allow me to build up my courage to open up to a friend of mine of my current dilemma....and it certainly paid off....i really felt so much better, the burden has been lifted slightly (though not much, but sufficient enough to allow my headache to subside)...i began to see things in a different picture and certainly, open up options that can help solve my problems too..and i felt so relief after that, to finally letting it out from my shell..i really appreciate it :)

God bless you both, my dear friends...i really apreciate your help, time and understanding....though i havent completely solved my problems, but i really hope that i can pull through this ordeal...and your little help is a big effect on me, and i am grateful for that. what a difference it has made. thanks amigo~

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